Slow. Slow down. No really, slower. It’s like this refrain that plays in my head daily. I’m nearly 3 months post-op, and I’m still hearing the same words from the Lord. SLOW DOWN!
At first it was pretty simple to move slowly. I literally could not move fast. But as I’ve recovered, gotten stronger, been able to physically move at a quicker pace, I find myself picking the up the frantic speed of life. Gotta get all the things done. Everyday. Now instead of fighting feelings of bitterness at my speed, I’m fighting against fleshly desires to hurry, hurry, hurry.
This week was Spring Break down here in Texas, and since we have friends and neighbors who go to public school, I felt it necessary to give my kids (and myself) the week off too. We took things slower, tackled yard work, and just generally enjoyed the perfect weather. A rare thing in Houston.
We fed the ducks. Because right in the middle of the triangle that is our neighborhood, is a great duck pond. God really knew what He was doing when He moved us here. And stale bread thrown at ducks will always lift our spirits. One of the ducks will even eat from our hands now.
But the thing I have learned this week, the thing that intentionally slowing down has taught me, is that for the past several years, as I’ve struggled to keep my head afloat and get everything done, to hold everything together, is that I’ve missed out, so much, on what makes these people I live with unique. What makes them come alive. That I haven’t been a good student of my children. And I’ve probably added an insane amount of stress to my husband.
But like all things with the Lord, when He puts His finger on an area that He wants to see change, I don’t feel ashamed or guilty for it. I am full of hope and expectation for the things I will learn about these incredible humans. I know that as I intentionally slow down, God will make me more fruitful in all areas of my life. I am gaining vision for my family and my home and our schooling.
So I am practicing the art of slow. And each time I get it right, I am rewarded with a smile like this
And that, in itself, is enough reason to keep it slow and steady.